Easing Your Back-to-School Transition: Why Connection and Play Matter Most

Every January the return to school after winter break brings out a mix of excitement, worry, and temporary chaos—for kids and parents. Even children who love school can struggle with the sudden shift from slow mornings and cozy routines to early alarms, crowded classrooms, and structured schedules.

The good news? The key to easing this transition isn’t complicated. No elaborate systems or perfectly organized backpacks required.

The key is connection and play.

Why This Transition Feels Big for Kids

During winter break, time slows down. Children get more freedom, more family closeness, and more opportunities to play on their terms. Then suddenly—backpacks on, rigid routines and high expectations.

For a child, that can feel like whiplash.

Their behavior may show it:

• More clinginess

• Difficulty waking up

• Big emotions in the evening

• Forgetfulness

• Behavioral regressions

These aren’t signs of defiance—they’re signs of adjustment. Kids are recalibrating, and that takes time.

Connection: The Foundation of a Smooth Return

Before focusing on academic readiness, parents can support their child by strengthening emotional readiness.

Some simple connection-focused practices include:

1. Morning moments of presence
Even one minute of eye contact, a cuddle, or a silly ritual can anchor a child before they head into a demanding school environment.

2. Fifteen minutes of “child-led time” after school
Let them choose the activity and the rules. This small window of control and closeness helps release the emotional backpack they’ve carried all day and reconnect with those who matter most to them: you.

3. Validate their feelings
Instead of “You’ll be fine,” try:
“It makes sense that going back feels hard. I’m right here with you.”
Validation doesn’t make feelings bigger—it makes them safer.

Play: A Powerful Tool for Regulation

Play isn’t just fun—it’s therapeutic. After winter break, it becomes one of the most effective ways to help kids regulate their nervous systems and transition back into structure.

Here’s why:

• Play gives children control: Returning to school often means fewer choices, so giving them freedom in play restores balance.

• Play discharges stress: Movement play—running, jumping, rough-and-tumble—helps release pent-up energy and tension.

• Play builds connection: Children bond through doing, not discussing.

Some easy after-school play ideas for the transition weeks:

• A five-minute dance party before homework

• Building a fort together (great for kids who need coziness)

• Role-playing “school” so they can process their day

• A quick game of chase or trampoline time for physical regulation

• Drawing or doodling while chatting casually about their day

What I Tell Parents

During this time, don’t worry about perfection. Focus on:

• Softening the schedule where you can

• Offering extra patience

• Prioritizing sleep

• Making room for silliness and connection

Children don’t need us to remove all discomfort. They just need us to walk along side them.

A Final Thought

The return to school after winter break is a transition, not a switch. Kids adjust best when we slow down enough to notice their cues and respond with warmth rather than pressure.

Connection tells them: You’re safe.
Play tells them: You’re capable.
Together, those two things ease the path back into routine—and strengthen your relationship long after the transition has passed.

Wishing you all connection as you transition,

Kristen McClintock LMHC